Trevin Wax does a great job distinguishing a quarrel from an argument. The former is poisonous, the latter is greatly needed.
Why I Wish Christians Would Argue More (No, Seriously)
Better conversations toward a better tomorrow.
Better conversations toward a better tomorrow.
Trevin Wax does a great job distinguishing a quarrel from an argument. The former is poisonous, the latter is greatly needed.
Haden lives in North Texas with his wife, daughter, and three dogs. View more posts
Haden Clark
Hi! Thank you for stopping by my site. Looking forward to get to know you better:) I’m Kat btw
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The article “Why I wish Christians would Argue More (no, seriously)” is right on! [Note: I wanted to post this long comment at the author’s site, but one has to belong to Facebook to do so, and I’m not. If anyone wants to repost this comment, in its entirety, go right ahead.]
I love to discuss Bible, life and politics with people, especially when they are not of the same opinion as I. Why? Because in doing so I learn. I increase my understanding of the topic and sometimes I realize that I have been wrong about something. But I only enjoy discussing with people who have the same attitude, and, I must say, such people are few and far between in Christianity.
No so long ago I was at a Bible study (I forget the topic – sorry) where I shared about a Biblical topic passionately. (‘Passionately’ does not include attacking or demeaning the opposing arguments.) Several in the study joined in, throwing out a few verses that they thought settled the argument, only that wasn’t the case and I explained why. A couple days later I got a call from the leader explaining that people were upset by what I shared. They were upset that they were challenged and I didn’t accept their system of belief on the topic, and I dared to share thus passionately. (I apologized to the group for ‘how’ I shared, not what I said, even though I didn’t feel an apology was actually needed.) After the apology, the ‘discussion’ was completely ignored by all; a shame as it was central to how the Bible is read.
And that brings me to the point. You [the article author] also mention this, though in other words. One of the reasons there is no ‘arguing’ among Christians is that people are afraid to question their church’s “statement of belief” or belief system. If they do, others in that church will quickly label the questioning person a ‘heretic’ and shun them. In other words, fear and lack of love reign! Christians fear fellowship with one that does not hold the beliefs they do, even though they claim that such is not true. But “actions speak louder then words”, it is said.
Yeshua (Jesus) prayed that the people would be ‘one’ as he and the Father are one. To look at the state of Christianity today, I would be certain that the prayer he said was actually, “make them splintered as we are splintered.” There isn’t a church I have heard of where I couldn’t go in and find some point of belief where they and I differ, and where they would then, at best, just shun me, at worst kick me out as a heretic. And mind you, I love Messiah Yeshua (Christ Jesus) and am completely grateful for (and accepting) what he accomplished through his life, death, and resurrection!
Why is this? Why are people so afraid of anything that is different? Granted, there are many “wolves in sheep’s clothing” out there to deceive the “elect”, but this fundamental fear goes beyond wanting to avoid the wolves. I put the following forward:
People are afraid of anything outside their comfort zone because they do not know the word of God! Not really. The churches have quit teaching the word of God, and in its place preach men’s words! In many, many churches, during a sermon, you won’t more then a verse or two of scripture read! And those churches that do read more scriptures have a very set “statement of belief” that they expect everyone to accept. They don’t allow a different understanding or belief.
If we look to see how God set up Israel, core and fundamental to the nation’s survival was repeatedly hearing God’s word. And it is interesting to note that God left room in His word for different people to develop different traditions and understandings.
If you’ve read through to this point, perhaps this statement is in your mind (and I apologize to the one that I’m not quoting word-for-word; I don’t remember it word-for-word); “In the core beliefs, unity; in all other things, charity.” I cringe when I hear this as there are so many different definitions of “core beliefs”, and even those that quote this hold entire “statements of belief” as “core”. The Bible is clear on what is “core”, and it starts with, “Yehovah (the LORD) our God is one!”
So, let’s get back to reading and discussing God’s word. Not just saying “let’s be like the Bereans,” but actually being so; in listening to people who aren’t exactly of your own belief, and then checking it out in scripture!
To that end I’ve also started a blog (in summer 2018 – http://www.discuss-life.com) where, hopefully, people can come and discuss ideas and understanding of the scripture, and partake in, yes I’ll say it, argumentation (in the understanding as described in the article).
– Yosef
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A question came to mind while reading your long comment, which I believe people need to ask themselves. You said you apologized for “how” you spoke at that meeting, after being criticized for it. My question is this: Why do we feel the need to apologize for being passionate, simply because people get uncomfortable? Jesus was the most passionate speaker, and he NEVER apologized for it. People actually felt offended at his manner. Are we not called to be like Christ? Are we not filled with so much passion for Christ, insomuch that we can speak for him very passionately? My dear husband is a good example. He gets so passionate, he always gets falsely accused of being angry; but that’s because the hearers get uncomfortable.
In my humble opinion, I don’t think we need to apologize for the passion we feel for such a Saviour! After all, what he accomplished at Calvary is the most wonderful thing in all God’s created universe! That he died to cancel out all our past sins, and by his glorious resurrection from the dead gave US the same power he has, to live FREE FROM SIN, is something to glory and boast in as passionately as we can!! 💥😊
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Thank you for responding to my comment. The reason I apologized to the people at that meeting is not that I felt that I had anything to apologize for. It was obvious that the people in that study were completely unused to anyone even disagreeing with them, let alone doing so with some passion. My ‘job’ (calling / mission / whatever you want to call it) right now is to help those people get past their traditions and what they have been told, and look into the Word of our God for themselves, and to see the beauty of all that God had written, and live by it as Yeshua (Jesus) did. Doing so is a longer process, so I plan to continue meeting with them for a while. If I hadn’t apologized, I probably would not have been very welcome there any more. I did not apologize for what I said, and I pointed that out to them during the apology.
And you are quite correct! Yeshua (Jesus) offended many people, yet his message and what he did for us continues to this day. But the topic in that study was not about salvation or Yeshua (Jesus). It was about life in Christ for his followers. Not sure that makes any difference, as I must admit, I respect people who share with true passion.
I will continue attending that Bible study when it starts again in a month or so (why do so many Christian home groups pause for the summer?…) Their topic will be the 10 Commandments (actually called the 10 Statements in the Bible). As there are many differences between the Hebrew viewpoint of the 10 Statements and the typical Christian viewpoint, especially where the first 5 statements (commandments) are concerned, I expect some very ‘passionate’ discussions. If you think about me, pray that I can communicate the beauty, depth, and importance of those statements to the group, and how Yeshua upholds those 10 statements as God’s definition of righteousness even today. And that I have the opportunity to do so.
Shalom!
– Yosef
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Tis true argument is different from a quarrel.
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